“I know your works, your toil and your patient endurance. ..... I also know that you are enduring patiently and bearing up for the sake of my name, and that you have not grown weary. But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first.”
Revelations 2:2-4
I’m reminded of the First Love I had for you, O my God!
A love that …
… made me trust fully and blindly in You.
… gave me confidence that I was safe in Your hands no matter what happened to me.
… made me hope against all odds.
… made me realise that everything happens for a reason, a reason that usually You alone knew.
… inspired me to take risks and make decisions that I never would have otherwise.
… made me overlook all my inabilities and instead trust in the strength You provided.
… led me to use whatever little talents I had for You without any hesitation.
A love that…
… made me place you above everything and everyone.
… made me talk to you and think about you all through my waking hours.
… made me wake up each day excited about the adventure we would have together.
… made my heart throb, my eyes well up, my feet jump, my knees bend, my hands raise up, my spirit lift up for You.
… never let me feel lonely, in fact it made me happier when I was with no one, because I had exclusive time with You.
A love that…
… made me go through the pains of giving up my older, unworthy ways just for the joy of my relationship with You
… drove me crazy so as to smile through my struggles, forgive those who hurt me, pray for those who hated me.
… made me strive to let You increase and me decrease.
… led me to sacrifice my pleasure and my preferences for your sake.
… urged me to talk about what You have done in my life to anyone, any time without fear or hesitation or effort
… made me yearn to know more about You, to read the Bible, to go to Church often, to attend prayer meetings, to spend time with the sick and the needy, to receive You in Eucharist daily.
A love that…
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… made me love myself and others the way I never did before.
… made me look at myself, the way You would look at me.
… made me Your child and feel like one too.
… made me secure in the knowledge that I’m worthy, I’m precious, I’m wanted, I’m loved, abundantly loved by You.
… pushed out darkness, doubt and fear from my heart
... transformed me from within.
… turned my life upside down!
It was a love in which only You were enough.
It was a love, I believed I would never lose.
Yet, here I am, Lord. So far away from the first love I had for you, so lacking in my faithfulness to you, so short of reciprocating your perfect, never-ending, personal love for me.
And, yet You see me just as You saw me in the light of my first love, not in the light of the state that I’m in right now - a state of ingratitude, indifference, lukewarmness and pride.
Help me, Lord. I lift up my eyes to you. Rekindle my love for you, even if it can be a fraction of the first love I had for you. For this, I ask Your Grace. Help me, Lord!
